Microaggressions can lead to Bullying

 

This month as we have been exploring what IS and IS NOT BULLYING, middle school has focused on Microaggressions. 

It is important as the adults shaping the lives of children, that we acknowledge the implicit bias that we have and pass on to the children. 

Psychologist Derald W. Sue defines microaggressions as: "The everyday slights, indignities, put downs, and insults that people of color, woman, LGBT populations or those who are marginalized experiences in their day-to-day interactions with people."

I shared with the students that there is a great book for their age group which explores this topic. Author Jerry Craft wrote the book New Kid to explore the experiences of a young black male switching schools and learning his own implicit bias while handling the biases of others. 

When we think about how to mindfully address this topic it is important to remember that we are not working toward creating division but unity. We want to explore experiences, observations, and the ideas that we need to challenge or change.

Dr. Sue when exploring and defining microaggressions created three categories. 

1. Microassaults

2. Microinsults

3. Microinvalidation 

Microaggression Discussion Video

The above link is a great discussion with college students regarding microaggressions. The instructor reviews the three types and talks with the students regarding their own experiences. 

Unfortunately most in a marginalized group will at one time experience a microaggression. 

Taking time to educate on what they are can help us overcome our implicit bias and help us notice any microaggressions we have used. 

Examples of Microaggressions are:

*Failing to learn how to pronounce someone's name after they have corrected several times

*Assuming a gender

*Using sexist language

*Expecting a single person to represent an entire group of people

*Using inappropriate humor toward: woman, people of color, based on gender identify, or sexual orientation.  

October is Bullying Awareness and Prevention Month

 October is Bullying Awareness and Prevention Month.

We would like to take this month to help our students understand what is and isn't bullying.

This chart is a great way to break down interactions with others. Just because someone calls a child a name, once, does not make it bullying. When a child chooses to not play with another child, this is not bullying.

Bullying is: Repeated, Hurts the Target Only, Is an effort to Control the other person.

This year our theme for October is: Know Better. Do Better. 

This comes from a Maya Angelou quote.

Our hope is that during the month of October, as we focus on bullying awareness education, we can teach our students to know better and then they can do better.

Let's Fall into Mindfulness

 This week marked the end of summer and beginning of fall. To honor the change of season I want to take some time to share some Fall Mindfulness Activities.

Mindful Autumn Walk

This time of year is perfect for a nice nature walk. We can throw on a hoodie, boots, and go. As we walk outside we can utilize our senses to explore the season. 

Start with sight. Look around. The leaves are changing from summer green to autumn yellows, oranges, and reds. As the leave change colors they slowly start to fall from the trees to the ground.

Next, as the leaves fall we walk on them and use our sense of hearing to hear them crunch. Perhaps we also walk across some acorns and hear their louder crunch. We can also hear the wind as it rustles through the trees as it knocks the leaves to the ground.

Then, we can use our sense of smell. The air has that crisp fall scent. Perhaps someone near by is baking apple pie or pumpkin pie. 

We can also utilize our sense of touch. We can collect leaves. Feel the difference between the newly fallen and the drier, cruncher leaves which have been on the ground longer. Perhaps we feel a corn stalk as we put in out as decoration. 

On your walk, if you happen to pass an orchard, take a moment to stop for an apple, cider, or donut. You can experience fall through your sense of taste.

Leaf Breathing

If during your nature walk you picked up and kept some leaves, you can now practice some breathing. 

Lay the leaf out flat and trace the sides slowly as you engage in deep in and out breaths. 

Pumpkin Sensing

Just as we utilized senses for our nature walk, you can now come inside and use your senses with a pumpkin.

Sight: Did you pick a traditional orange pumpkin? Or maybe you went for a white one this year? How big or small is the pumpkin? Is it tall, fat, or short.... Is it smooth or does it have some bumps you can see? Does it have a long or short stem?

Touch: As you explore sight, begin touching and feeling. How heavy or light is the it? Does it feel smooth or bumpy? How many ridges can you feel?

Smell: Does it smell? It might not unless you cut it open. If you choose to cut it open you also have a chance to feel, see, touch, smell, and taste the inside!

Hear: Tap or knock in the pumpkin, how does it sound?

Taste: If you don't want to try you raw pumpkin you can pick up pumpkin seeds, canned pumpkin, or maybe some pumpkin muffins. Have a little pumpkin treat. Have some fun!

Relationships with Self and Others

 This week information was released linking mental health concerns with social media. If you are anything like me this is something you have already noticed and expressed concern regarding. 

The Wall Street Journal had an article this week with the title "Facebook knows Instagram is Toxic to Teen Girls.." Don't be mislead and think it only applies to girls, the article states that the studies show boys are affected too.

23% of girls report that when they feel bad about themselves, Instagram has made them feel worse. 14% of boys also report this same feeling.

We unfortunately cannot simply tell our children to ignore social media. They will not and it is unrealistic to think that they will. That doesn't mean the situation is hopeless. We can equip our children and ourselves with emotional support and understanding.

Mindfulness is a great way to practice self-care, self-acceptance, and self-understanding. When we practice mindfulness we learn to accept the present moment as it is, without judgment. The study on Instagram and mental health presented us with the information that teens (and preteens) are stressed about finding the perfect picture, to show the perfect them. These girls and boys judge themselves based on how others look in photos posted.

Taking time to share a mindful moment with your student could help build resilience, self-love, and a sense that they do not have to be perfect and can accept each moment and themselves, as is. 

A great mindfulness is Metta Loving-Kindness. Sending well wishes toward ourselves (and others). Another  great mindful practice to address and combat this concern is, gratitude. Daily taking time to list at least three things we are grateful for can boost our mood, help us look for the good in each day, and create a deeper connection with those with whom we are grateful

After nearly a year and a half of students learning from a computer it can be a challenge to move away from a screen and build meaningful interpersonal relationships. Before our students can build relationships with others it is important for them to build relationships with themselves. Relationships which are healthy and positive. Mindfulness can and will help. 

If you feel your student is struggling with friendships, self-acceptance, or anything else which concerns you, please reach out.

Pamela McKenzie, Behavior Specialist, 55.pmckenzie@nhaschools.com

Why Mindfulness Important to Students.

 This morning when I googled "finding clam in the chaos" the first thing Google gave me was "Meditation."

The idea of meditation can feel too spiritual, too touchy-feely, too different. In stead of meditation some like to say, "centering thoughts" or " entering a calm space." 

Mindfulness is about finding that inner calm which will allow great attention to the present. As we start this new school year our hope is that each student will find the calm inner space to have the attention to learn.

Mindfulness is a way of self regulating emotions, the pleasant and unpleasant. If a student it too hyper they will not focus on a lesson. If a student is too tired they will struggle with focus and attention. When a feeling takes over the attention of the brain, the emotion center turns off the attention and memory centers of the brain.

As we start school our students learn about the brain and how it works. They learn that the Amygdala is their emotion center and it the part of the brain responsible for "fight, flight, freeze, or faint." They also learn that the memory part of the brain is the Hippocampus. When the Amygdala is firing, and a student is feeling a strong emotion, the Hippocampus is turned off. The brain will not activate the memory when emotions are in control. Students then learn that by taking deep breaths and practicing mindfulness they can wake up the Prefrontal Cortex. This part of the brain is responsible for wise choices. This part of the brain talks to the Hippocampus to help make wise choices and enact memory. When the Amygdala is activated the Prefrontal Cortex will not operate.

Mindfulness is key to helping all of us activate the parts of the brain which are needed for learning and memory.

Welcome Back

 

Welcome Back to School. Let's get the 2021-2022 year started right! 

Take a deep breath. Send your student some loving-kindness as you wish them luck on their first day. Don't forget to send yourself some loving-kindness. Remember, you got up early too, you got your student to school, and you cheered them on as they entered the building to start another year of learning and success! 

Mindfulness is being present and aware. As we begin again, take time to be present in each moment. Remember, there are no "right" or "wrong" feelings, we need to accept what we feel, figure out where it is coming from, and then embrace the helpful and release the hurtful.

This year my goal is to send this blog out at least once a month, hopefully more! I will review previously share mindfulness, social emotional learning, and shared student-family support. I will continue my personal journey of continued mindfulness education to provide you with new and helpful tips and resources. As always, please feel free to leave comments or contact me. Working as partners in education is the best way for your student and your family to thrive. 

Pamela McKenzie, Achievement and Behavior Support Specialist, 55.pmckenzie@nhaschools.com

Preparing for a Mindful Self- Care Summer

 Preparing for summer is fun for students and at times stressful for adults. Parents may still be working and need to find child care. Parents may be home and used to a routine and not sure what to have children do all day.

Mindfully preparing for your summer vacation can help alleviate stress and anxiety. Take a deep breath, you've got this.

In this blog I wanted to share some summer success tips. If you are a an easy going parent and your kids are easy going...go easy and enjoy. If you would like a little more structure and routine take a look. 

Start with routine. Just because no alarms are set for school doesn't mean they still can't be set. If you have a schedule to keep for work, keep them on your schedule. If you don't have to work, pick a time you want them up by each day and let them know.

Once you have set the Rise and Shine time, think about what  the day should look like for your student. To help reduce summer loss the school provides books to students with incentives to complete the books. When my now fourth grader was in kindergarten we started our summer routine right away. We would eat breakfast together and then work on about 4-5 pages from her summer learning book. We started the day with education (that's how I saw it...she saw as it as "getting it over and done with fast to move on!).

I am a fan of reading and love to have a stack of summer books to read. Create a summer reading list for your student. Encourage them with small rewards. Or make screen time contingent on how many pages they read a day. If your local library is open, take a field trip each week to check our new books. Encourage trying a non-fiction or poetry book. 

Have your student get some addresses from their friends and create cards to send. Maybe even start a "pen-pal" for the summer writing activity.

At a lose for creative educational ideas, ask a teacher. Take time to ask your student's teacher from this year or reach out to the next grade and learn some ideas. Get crafty and ask the art teacher for some ideas!

Not every day will be fun, warm, and full of sun. Make sure to have some board games on hand for rainy days. Or try a puzzle. Puzzle are a great way to build skills such as; working together, sorting, organizing, logic, and visualization of a finished project.

Don't forget the responsibilities. Children moan and groan when it's chore time, but that is just fine. Chores teach responsibility, service toward others, helping out, caring, and of course learning to clean and care for others (such as pets). Chores can be a morning task or a night task. In my house, if you want to have screen time after dinner, you clear the table, sweep the floor, feed the animals and ask what else needs to be done (such as unloading or loading the dishwasher). I also have a great rule in my house...on laundry day, if you wake up after the last load is in the dryer...you do your own. I only wash the clothes that are by the washer before the last load is cleaned. My teenaged son is good at doing his own laundry, he has to be, he never wakes up on time.

A summer full of mindfulness for you, as the adult, is finding time for self-care. That means taking time to put a little structure into your day.