Have you ever been caught in a never ending string of "why" from a child? There was once a time that my oldest two children asked why so much I had to limit them to one why a day. Their whys were not for true curiosity but rather to simply see how many whys they could make someone answer.
According to Stanford Health when children ask a true why question is the beginning of their curiosity. They are seeking to understand what they see and hear. Giving a child an answer or even saying you do not know but suggesting you look it up together is the beginning of knowledge exploration. We should engage the why. Even if it is exhausting.
The dreaded "why" leaves us never wanting to hear someone ask "Why".
When I was trained in forensic interviewing of children we were taught to never ask a child why. Why in that instance is not an information seeking question.
Combing my training of never asking a child why and dreading a child asking me why, I have long not liked why questions. I have avoided them.
This week I listened to a mindfulness that suggested learning to ask ourselves why.
Above is a link to the why mindfulness that has me reconsidering the word why and all of it's possibilities.
Is your mind stuck?
Is something becoming repetitive in your mind?
Try a why.
When we begin to ask why we dig deeper and deeper. We ask more questions and attempt to solve and resolve.
Why am I feeling upset?
Why did that upset me?
Why couldn't I stay calm?
Why does that person get to me?
Why do I allow them to get to me?
Why should it matter what others say?
Why can I not control my thoughts?
Why can I not control my actions and reactions?
Why do I not ask for help?
Why do I not accept help?
If you listened to the quick mindfulness linked above you will know it is suggested that you ask why until you cannot ask why anymore. Ask until you have run out of whys.
Are you still stuck?
Have you emptied your mind?
Have you explored questions?
Have you figured anything out?
Could you utilize this mindfulness tool to help yourself reach out to others? Perhaps one of your why questions was asking yourself "why do I not ask for help?" Did you ask and attempt to answer? Can you now make a plan to ask for help?
Could be explore this mindfulness with your student?
Can we take time to work with them and explore their whys and learn what has them stuck?
Try a WHY
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